fire-burning rage.

i was so enthusiastic when i heard mrs lynn tan (the teacher-in-charge of sch library) asked maryam (but in the end, she didnt go and fizah sub-ed her) to join her and a few other teachers to Kinokuniya to buy the library new books. without hesitating, i asked her if i could follow and told her that i have many many many books in mind to recommend the school. i was soo peppy not because i had the chance to go to a bookstore in Orchard Rd, it was allll because i wanted the pasirians to read.. yes, its true. there are soo many good books in this world that are soo damn good that will surely make a book-hater turn into a book-lover. and by reading books can really open ones' minds.

but some teachers were TOO afraid of students widening their minds. is that sick or what?? so when are they going to know all the reality in this world?? (put aside lord of the rings and eragon and some other fantasy books..) when they turned adult? and when an adult who is just trying to figure the reality, is truly an adult DORK. at this point of time, when teenagers are curious about life and all other things, they SHOULD allow such books. IMAGINE those mats and step-gangsters were to read books perhaps about justice and crimes and mystery, wouldnt this make them more smarter and eventually realise that the life they are living right now is damn stupid. and when minahs or the fungi girls read about moving stories about rape, adultery, hard-life of teenage parents etc, wouldnt this make them at least think with their god-given brains and soon could envisage a more beneficial life.. sad but true, the teachers would not see the light that i see in these kids. all they want the 'kids' (as it is the term that they call us) to just PLAINLY read books and not value something out of it (except the vocab and grammar..).

so me and dearie went on the search for our favourite-est books that we have read before. and when we thought it was pretty good for non-bookworms to read the books we like, some of the v. v. fill in the blanks teachers openly criticised the book being way TOO unsuitable for the 'kids'. well, we got almost tons of books that we love and were some ferociously and some politely REJECTED by the teachers. irratated? YES, very much. gawd. i felt sooo angry at these human beings. i wish i could knock their heads so that they have more sense. the students do know about SEX, the word FUCK, RAPE, MURDER, and etc. so why are they rejecting the kind of books that featured these 'censored' things when in the end, the book will eventually somehow or rather point out THE RIGHT AND THE WRONG...? well, while some was already used to rejecting our choice of books till they think that we are just plain dumb 'kids' that dont know a hoot about adult life and yadayadayada.... , some really could see that we were ANGRY and would politely reject the books and reasoned with us. and a polite one explained that, these new books are for the mass which consists of the non-bookworms, immature and students mainly from sec 1-3, so picking out books that we think is good is not suitable for them. sighs. wouldnt these 'kids' be more mature when they read more mature pieces than reading mary kate and ashley oslen books and make them EVEN more immature. -_-

stupid stupid stupid.
and all that they did today, has made an impression on me that they thought they could outsmart us and thought we were just some kiddos. -_- but i really wanna point out that only some has actually considered our feelings, at least mrs lynn tan has made an effort to hide it from me when she rejected the book i picked. and another eventually smiled at me and understood how i felt when she saw my pissed face.